So, this is going to be one of the quickest trips to San Francisco ever--I am in town for Wondercon this year and it promises to be a manic trip. I found a flight on United for $145 roundtrip ($112 before taxes and whatever fees they decide people pay these days) so I am typing this in LAX a bit before my plane start boarding. I would try to upload this before I left, but, of course, LAX does not have free Internet--it's fee Internet here--and I am not going to pay $8 or whatever for 30 minutes. Ugh, when will the madness end? Free Internet makes people happy, it keeps them occupied, it keeps people in a reasonable state of mind. Flying is already so frustrating, why not do what the coffee shop down the block has done before years?

Pretty much every week, there's a burrito in my life. I usually pick it up on the way home after yoga and, without exception, I always leave smiling. Seriously, everyone who works there is just damn pleasant, and always remembers me and just seems to enjoy working there, that I always leave going, "Man, I love LA." This morning I had the same experience--I went to The Griddle for breakfast--and, again, everyone there was just so nice and relaxed and just...cool that it really just made me stoked. I have talked about this with a few folks who have leave LA recently, and they have made similar remarks--when you are in LA, people are just more pleasant. I know this is awful generalization, but if I compare my experiences, say, in the grocery stores in New York, where most of the time everyone was just sullen and irritated to be there, and to the grocery stores in LA, where, time and time again, the people working there are honestly helpful and pleasant--the vast majority of the time, the comparison holds. I was in a Ralph's the other day trying to find rice milk for Whit, and when the guy didn't know, he tracked down another person, who told me exactly where it was (Aisle 8, but the rice milk is right behind a post, so make sure to look carefully) and then, later, when I bumped into the guy again, he asked to make sure if I had found it or not. Like, this is just some dude who works at a Ralph's, you know?

These are small things, totally, but when there is nothing but doom and gloom on the news and when you are falling asleep doing math to see how much money you have left in your account for the weekend, they make a huge difference. I know for a fact that there are nice places in New York--I don't mean to pick on that great and fantastic city, I have had my time with superb lame asses in San Francisco--but day to day, my life in LA is just more pleasant and I don't know anyone else who has moved here from another city who will disagree with me.

Anyway, I just wanted to put that out there because I keep wanting to post that when I leave the burrito place but I never remember (and I admit, it's a Chipotle, which is a chain, I realize, but these guys are so close to my place and they really do it for for me (I am a simple burrito person--chicken, black beans, rice, hot salsa)).

The other night a good friend of mine, a classmate in my acting class, admitted to us that she was taking a hiatus of indeterminate length from acting. She was not going to class anymore and she had told her agents that she was done for now, possibly forever. The news hit everyone pretty hard and I have been thinking about it a lot. The thing is, she's a terrific actor. She's got great comic chops, can do drama no problem, and has a great look.

It's a big deal when someone quits, especially when it's someone you see a lot, because you feel like you are losing a team member, in a way. This whole endeavor is frustrating, as you know, but it is a lot easier when you can share your experiences and frustrations with others, it's a lot easier to not get an audition when you know it's not just you. We all want her to come back to acting, but we all recognize that this is not something she took lightly, that this was a fundamental decision, a big shift in her life and she knew it.

I am sure some of us are thinking, deep down, "Is this what I should be doing? Is she getting out a sign that I should be getting out? I'm not getting any younger, should I just quit while I am ahead/behind? Maybe this is not right for me--sure I have fun doing it, but I haven't booked a spot in a year, maybe I should just be responsible and get out of LA and live the rest of my life without this crap." It's all there, you know? When you hang out with other actors who are slogging, you get the sense, "Hey, this is worth doing, if they are not giving up, I'm certainly not going to!" When one of your crew bows out, it rattles you, it really does.

I'm not quitting. I don't want to and I don't have to. I am extraordinarily lucky that I have a job that appreciates my acting life and actually leverages my experience whenever possible. It's taken years to get that balance to happen and I am not going throw it away because acting is hard. It's all hard, you know?

I was watching In Bruges the other night (I recommend it, it's a great movie) and one of the things I liked most about it was just the scenes of every day life in this quaint Belgium city. You know the kind, with the really old, thin houses and big plazas with requisite open air cafes? And I thought about the life of those people who run those little cafes and restaurants, providing that quintessential European experience to countless travelers, all these people on their way to somewhere else, stopping in, hanging out at your place, then leaving, never to be seen again. I wonder what it would be like to own, or at least work in place where the world flows by past you as you wash the dishes. I can see the allure of it and part of me wishes that that's what I wanted, but I don't. Who knows.

I started this at the airport and now I am in a BART train, heading to San Francisco. I'll post this tonight...